Comments on: Day 4 http://www.afburns.com/2008/03/24/day-4/ Alexander Burns's writing sketchbook Sat, 28 Aug 2010 15:33:34 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0.1 By: Alexander Burns http://www.afburns.com/2008/03/24/day-4/comment-page-1/#comment-67 Alexander Burns Tue, 25 Mar 2008 14:34:21 +0000 http://afburns.wordpress.com/?p=77#comment-67 That's exactly what I was thinking, Nathan! The editor of excellent SpaceWesterns.com, everyone! That’s exactly what I was thinking, Nathan!

The editor of excellent SpaceWesterns.com, everyone!

]]> By: Nathan E. Lilly http://www.afburns.com/2008/03/24/day-4/comment-page-1/#comment-68 Nathan E. Lilly Tue, 25 Mar 2008 13:57:14 +0000 http://afburns.wordpress.com/?p=77#comment-68 Very cool. Now finish it and submit it to <a href="http://www.spacewesterns.com/" rel="nofollow">SpaceWesterns.com</a>, if you're so obliged. Very cool.

Now finish it and submit it to SpaceWesterns.com, if you’re so obliged.

]]> By: Alexander Burns http://www.afburns.com/2008/03/24/day-4/comment-page-1/#comment-66 Alexander Burns Tue, 25 Mar 2008 12:42:01 +0000 http://afburns.wordpress.com/?p=77#comment-66 Having slept finally, and looking it over, a few notes to myself: -Reduce size of convoy to simplify the action -Remove guns from the 'packs (where would they go, anyway?) and figure out a way for the crew to hold and fire their own guns, maybe steering solely with the stirrups. That would be a little more westerny. -Maybe put people in the gun turrets? -Need a way for the hijackers to get away with the loot, as the convoy can't be taken off the tracks (would anti-grav packs have a weight limit? hmm) -More description of the landscape at the start. -New names. Eesh those are bad. Having slept finally, and looking it over, a few notes to myself:

-Reduce size of convoy to simplify the action
-Remove guns from the ‘packs (where would they go, anyway?) and figure out a way for the crew to hold and fire their own guns, maybe steering solely with the stirrups. That would be a little more westerny.
-Maybe put people in the gun turrets?
-Need a way for the hijackers to get away with the loot, as the convoy can’t be taken off the tracks (would anti-grav packs have a weight limit? hmm)
-More description of the landscape at the start.
-New names. Eesh those are bad.

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